Velma Vixen

Once upon a time in Turkey while at the store scouring the aisles for swimming goggles my son said something that made me giggle.  We had only looked where we thought the goggles should be.  No goggles.  So my almost 13 year old son said this, “I have an idea.  Let’s split up.  Daphne, Fred and I will go this way.  You guys go that way.”  I laughed as I thought about it.  Why did he choose to go with Daphne and Fred? What about Scooby, Shaggy, and Velma?  And why in the hell did they always split up that way?  I think Fred wanted some alone time with Daphne so he sent the others off to chase imaginary monsters.  You never saw anything kinky, and Fred and Daphne always showed up later looking just as put together as when they left.  Fred’s ascot and Daphne’s scarf looking pristine and perfect.  Poor Velma usually seemed to get stuck with Shaggy and Scooby who wouldn’t do anything without a Scooby Snack or two.  I’ve always wondered what was so great about those Scooby Snacks.  Scooby and Shaggy wouldn’t put themselves in potentially dangerous situations for dog food, would they?  Surely not.  Then at some point Velma would lose her glasses which usually resulted in them being found next to whatever ghost, monster, or demon they were out to uncover.  And there was lots of running.  Always with the running.  And so now we come back to me.  If I had to choose who to go with when we split up to look for goggles I would choose Velma.  I like the short-haired, smart type.  I bet under that orange turtleneck she was a little vixen.  And I’m all about that!