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I hate this

Lesbo says this is my safe place to say anything I want.  Not quite anything.  There are a couple of things I can’t say here just yet.  I am ready to scream them out, but I have to have patience.  Normally I am a very patient person.  I can wait when necessary.  My problem now is that the thing I want to scream out seems so very necessary.  And I can’t do a damn thing about it.  Yet.  

I read back over what I just wrote and wonder if I should even say that much.

Let’s move on to a happier subject.  I am going to see Brad Paisley in concert on Sept. 11!  I can’t even tell you how excited I am about that!  I’ve wanted to see him for awhile now, but I couldn’t find anyone to go with me.  He came to town for the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo and nobody would agree to go.  I wasn’t about to go alone.  He’s coming again and this time I get to go.  OH my gosh….BRAD PAISLEY!!!!  I asked a friend if she would go with me, and she said yes.  She ended up getting the tickets for me for my birthday.  And she doesn’t even like country music.  Poor thing will just have to suffer through it.  

And in other news I bought a vanilla lime candle at Yankee Candle the other day.  It smells very much like a margarita which makes me happy.  I LOVE candles.  I love margaritas too, but that’s another story.

See…this is what happens when I can’t talk about what I want to talk about.  You get random drivel.  

Speaking of random drivel…my sister wants to talk to me tomorrow night.  Big huge sigh.  It won’t be random at all.  There is purpose in her visit.  I predict sad and mad as her response to what is going on.  And unlike with my dad I expect to see the anger.  

Ok…I have to stop now.  I am getting frustrated that I have to hold my tongue.  I can’t wait for the freedom to say whatever the hell I want.  I can’t wait!


4 responses »

  1. You’ll say it here when you’re ready.

    Hold your head up – you made it through the talk with our father, you can make it through this one, too.

  2. Nat, first of all, I have to admit that I’ve been reading your site ever since you first visited mine…not stalking you, just wasn’t sure about how you might feel about us from that Special Church. So when I saw you refer to Lesbo in the post, I am figuring, all is well.

    All that to say this: we are here for you. I think Les and I speak accurately for everyone else in our (dysfuntional) group when we say that we support you and will always be here if you just need to unload.

    You are our Friend.

  3. random drivel is perfectly fine. it’s your space to do with what you want.

    as for the chat with your sister, hold your chin up, lady. this too shall pass. you’re doing something for yourself that you need to do. people who love you, love you for YOU. and while they may be upset in the beginning, they will move forward. it’s your life. not theirs.

    be true to yourself, nat. you deserve that.

    and come to all of us when you need to. we’re always here for you. always always.

  4. We love you and hopefuly your sister will see you for the sweet amazing woman you are. Time will allow your shouting from the rooftops whatever it is you are wanting to scream. 😉


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