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What exactly are we talking about?

This morning I was talking with a friend on the phone.  She was giving me a play by play on a cooking show she was watching on TV.  Here’s how the conversation went.

Her:  He’s putting bacon fat in this pot.  What kind of pot is that?  I’ve never seen a pot like that in my life.  I want one.

Me:  I don’t know.  I am not watching TV.

Her:  Now he’s putting onion, celery, and garlic in the bacon grease.  That’s the Holy Trinity!  

Me:  The Holy Trinity?  Hahahaha.  

Her:  No seriously.  Don’t be laughing at the Holy Trinity.  That’s sacrilegious. 

Me:  Oh ok then.  I’m gonna go now.  I need a shower.

Her:  And now he’s putting fatback in the pan.  Do you hear that sizzling?  It smells so good!

Me:  No, I’m not watching TV.  Ok, going now…

Her:  Now he’s adding cabbage.  YUM! 

Me:  Bye

Her:  Bye

At this point I get in the shower.  I barely have time to get wet and my phone chimes.  Then it chimes again.  I wash my hair.  It chimes again.  After 5 chimes I finally step out of the shower to see who and what’s so important.

By text…

Her:  He’s putting ANDOUILLE SAUSAGE in the cabbage!!!  SCORE!

Her:  AAANNNNDDDDDD…He’s making brisket in a pressure cooker.  Oh mon Dieu!

Her:  W/ garlic, carrots, mushrooms, celery, baby turnips, red potatoes in beef broth.  Slap yo mama!!

Her:  Next up…Granpa’s cornbread in a cast iron skillet.

Her:  TURN ON CH 8…he’s plating!

Me: (trying to catch my breath from laughing so hard at “He’s plating!”) I’m in the shower!  I finally got out to find out what was so exciting that my phone was blowing up.  Now there’s a puddle of water on the floor.

Her:  Yeah, it’s making me puddle, too! 

Me:  I was just thinking the same thing!  Hahahahaha

Me:  You might need a cigarette after that climax!

Her:  Chil’ talk about good!

Her:  Fo’ sure!

Me:  All this food/sex talk is kinda turning me on.  Now I need a cold shower.

Her:  I need a pressure cooker.

Me:  You’re killing me. 


One response »

  1. Ha! What a fun friend. That is. . . was she trying to be funny?

    It was good to hear from you today on The Jason Show. I’ve not been reading much of any blogs lately, but I’ve wondered how yo’re doing. It seems you’re doing pretty well.


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